Well this weekend marks the hardest time I'm sure in my husband's adult life.
My mother-in-law passed on August 24, 2008.
Stricken with breast cancer she finally stopped treatment and went into hospice the beginning of July of last year. By the middle of last August, she started to go down hill really fast.
I told my husband that he and his sister needed to let her go and then tell her it was o.k. to go.
Oddly enough...I found myself doing a lot of "telling" and I didn't really enjoy my new found "expert" status.
The entire time of our marriage...I had always looked to him to guide us through problems and life situations...you know...someone who can emotionally detach while us "women folk" get into deeper drama or freak out. Now I was the one taking the helm, and folks were looking at me ...not saying...but I know thinking...
"Your mom is gone...tell us what to do...what to say...how to function."
I did the best I could and sat my boys down to tell them we were going over (today on the 22nd)...to say goodbye to Granny since she was going to heaven soon.
She was unconscious by the time we got there...but we still said goodbye. My oldest took things quite hard...and my middle was set on getting soda.
He drank two cans before I even blinked.
It was Granny's house. And Granny ALWAYS let them have soda, she always had their favorite kinds in the "icebox" (as she called it)
...any time, any day, without reservation.
(I have to admit...in the past and under my breath I've said a few snotty remarks about Granny and letting them have soda)...but that just edged her on...and they'd end up with a 6 pack for the road...so I learned to keep my mouth shut!
He kept looking at me to "complain" about the soda...and I told him.
"If granny could tell you...she would let you have it."
At my house there was always a 6 pack of Diet Coke under my kitchen sink...not for my family (we don't do soda)...but her Granny...so you know she was a die heart drinker!
Finally my middle one understood and started taking things hard too.
Life is hard, but Praise God she's in heaven...and we'll see her again.
For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever... (1 Thessalonians 4:16 and 17)
and I kind of wish I had some soda in my house.