Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Well I'm restricted too!

Due to two rude encounters my 10 yr old had this weekend (one with the children's choir lady/one with his Sunday School teacher)...He's on electronic restriction for the next week. (That means no computer or gameboy/ds). With the tv - if it's on and dad and mom are watching...he can watch the show...if Bry is watching...he can watch it but he can't turn the tv on himself.
I'm thinking that it would have been easier spanking him and getting it over with...but that's not really working lately...so restriction city here we come.

Things were bearable until I received a call from my girlfriend telling me she's coming up from Oceanside for the weekend because it's one of her sons birthday. Her oldest will stay with us all day Saturday. There en lies the problem...it's going to be an electronic fest and my middle one won't be apart of it. When he finds out...he'll be crying and begging to be off restriction early. He already has missed Awana, a play date on Tuesday, he isn't going to the homeschool party on Friday and hasn't left the house and yard since Sunday...should I let him have electronics Saturday? If I do that's a day early and I feel the punishment would have been for nothing. I'm kind of leaning towards no electronics Saturday and let him run errands with me.

Leave a comment below and let me know what you think.
Thanks Lorrie

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Lors - like usual you have a habit of overkill. When you give electronic restriction it should only be for a few days. A whole week is overkill. It would have been better 2 hv 2 days of nothing, no tv, computer, outside anything to make the point. You've made the rule...he'll have to miss out Saturday. You're rite on that point...but liten up of he'll really start rebellin on ya.
LOVE YA
Billie

Anonymous said...

I don't know if I published my comment so I'll write it again.
Lors - like usual you are WAY OVERKILL. You should have had 2 days of nothing, no electronics, no tv, no outside...anything and that way it would have been more effective as oppose to dragin out the thang. If you don't liten up...he'll git even more rebellious. Don't force him to go if he doesn't want to...that way he won't be so bent on actin out.
-Billie

Vicki Karayan said...

Well from the SUNDAY school teacher...When I have these issues come up I have created a system where they can earn a day off. If they can do what they are suppose to and maybe do additional chores or write a paper on manners or something along those lines they can earn time off or extra privledges for doing the right thing. It works pretty well, they understand they are still "grounded" and if during the "off time" they mess up it adds a day or an hour or whatever works for mom or the "dicipliner". I fully understand the "I'm" restricted too.. With 4 all of the same age, I felt "grounded" a lot especially since their dad was deployed, so it was just me... Setting time frames we know we can stick to helps too... They say (I took a police department class on this that lasted 6 months) that keeping it short is the best policy. 3 days max seems to work, longer than that then they will make a mistake or you will go crazy and give up. Just suggestions from a crazy mom of five with 3 grandchildren and 2 more on the way... We can talk about the messengers of news later on... :) Hugs
Vicki

Tracy said...

If you choose to leave him home and use the electronics on Sat., have him do a nice essay for you...example: why/how am I in the punishment I'm in or one of Jeff's faves..verse/story from Bible that is in the same ballpark of why he's on restriction.
This saves you the headache/stress of dealing with him whining either seeing others on Sat. doing what he also wants to do and/or while you're trying to get your errands done. It also puts the ball all in his court because if he chooses not to do the "assignment" properly or at all then it's his own fault that will be easier to see that he's not doing what he wants. I'd leave him at home though separate except for meals while you're gone...really will hit home that you're not messing around and may spark him to catch himself before he gets in trouble again. Hang in there and be strong:-) been there and done it many times so I understand and believe me, each time it'll be needing to be handled differently, my experience anyway. It is harder on us parents than the kid when we restrict them from things.

Anonymous said...

Hi Lorrie:
I've too had to take electronics away from my kids. When they want it bad enought I make them earn it back by doing a chore that they either dislike or is huge like cleaning their room, the toy room, etc, which is always a huge disaster. If the task is too great and they don't want to do it they can't earn back what has been lost. If it means that much to him, he can do the task and earn it back.
Works for me!!
Dana

Anonymous said...

So sorry I just opened my email. Had been busy with Shadow our pug....She delivered her puppies Wednesday. I was a good "vet", she lost her first two puppies only 4 lived. I didn't get any sleep for three days to make sure she doesn't sit on the puppies. Because puppies had sucking problems, I have to pump her breasts for them to be fed. I felt like me having a baby all over again.

How did your weekend go? If you ask my opinion..... withholding electronics for Nathan is not effective. We should remember electronics help him keep still and focused. Withhold electronics by time increments. . Withhold one item at a time...eg. one favorite tv program in the AM, only one of his favorite tv program in PM. The next day...no TV only 1/2 hr video game. Let him practice his writing or oral reading. Just be firm with the way you schedule though. It is not necessary to ground him for a week or you will be even more stressed out. "Good Luck!"
-Alice

Anonymous said...

Dr dobson says direct disobedience is a spanking. I am beginning to use a wooden spoon:)


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